the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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