i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
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