i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Randomize
