who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize