So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
