I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
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