I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
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