This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
