I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
