i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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