In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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