wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I wish i was in the wii world.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
