I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
don't judge my taste in strippers
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
