"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
That's when you crack a 10am beer
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
