yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
