their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize