I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
