i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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