hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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