using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Randomize
