that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Randomize
