ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i barfeds in our rink
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
