I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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