i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize