So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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