if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
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