Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry randypretzler hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(734): View more from Michigan

Got a toothbrush?

Fav 7 2519 1358
share tweet
(631): View more from New York

I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...

Fav 27 2011 2633
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(541): View more from Oregon

Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.

Fav 72 6918 2320
share tweet
(630): View more from Illinois

you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.

Fav 5 6042 1981
share tweet
(217): View more from Illinois

Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside

Fav 13 9769 1451
share tweet
(647): View more from Ontario

She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.

Fav 23 3215 2139
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(518): View more from New York

it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.

Fav 1 985 2012
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(503): View more from Oregon

On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral

Fav 1 936 544
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(908): View more from New Jersey

It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.

Fav 0 30 25
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT