How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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