dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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