If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize