just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
