Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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