ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
