The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize