Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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