Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
