It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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