About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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