Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
