Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
