plz talk dirty to me
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Randomize
