I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
She's the barista slut.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
