I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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