the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
