At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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