hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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