Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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