love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
