Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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