Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
